More Dad Facts

By Maddie Allard

IG: @bad__elyn

In my last article, I made one thing pretty clear – I’ve spent most of my adult life disappointing my father. I know it’s a pretty heavy statement, but trust me. It gets even more interesting than that.

Not too long ago, he gathered the family together to talk about my “alcohol problem.”  They all sat there with concerned looks on their faces, telling me how worried they were, and how I should consider AA. Apparently, it’s unacceptable for a twenty-something to engage in social drinking and share the highlights of those experiences with their parents.  We all drink wine while watching the Bachelorette, right? Isn’t that the whole premise of the show?

Either way, I exploded.

In a fit of anger, I stormed out of the house, leaving my family behind in the tornado of my emotions. It wasn’t until days later when my dad was admitted to the hospital for serious and unknown health issues, that we finally talked. We came to an agreement that no, I do not have a problem. I’m actually just a normal 24-year-old who enjoys the occasional margarita or ten.

I understand the root of my dad’s concern. At 20, I was diagnosed with depression. My condition peaked post grad when I would dissociate to the point where I was having bi-monthly breakdowns.  As bad as my condition was, I somehow knew the right moment to call my parents – at three o’clock in the morning – while resisting the urge to break any objects I could find to cut myself open. I wasn’t feeling, and I needed to feel.

As horrifying as this is to experience, I can’t image how awful it must have felt to be my parents on the other end of the phone during those moments

Ever since those calls, my dad is concerned that every decision I make will be bad for my depression, especially those he is morally opposed to.

– Vegetarianism= is horrible for depression.

– Bisexuality= bad for depression (I’m now dealing with twice the rejection).

-Weed= SUPER terrible. Like the absolute WORST for anyone who even thought they might be depressed at any given moment in their life.

This brings me to the point of my article.

Dad Fact 2:

Marijuana Is Horrible for People With Depression

It’s a miracle I haven’t jumped off a building in a raging fit while stoned. Caffeine may make me disassociate, but one puff of Mary Jane sends me straight to Beelzebub.

Did you know that every time you breathe in marijuana, you are causing your brain to produce less dopamine? It’s so bad that if you smoke one joint every month for 12 months, it’s equivalent to the dementor’s kiss. That’s right kids. Puff the magic dragon and watch your soul leave your body while you become a human bowl of Jell-O.

Honestly, it wasn’t the weight of joblessness right after graduating college that sent me down a depression spiral. I wasn’t feeling inadequate or helpless. It was all that weed I was smoking. That’s a simple fix!

Those who medicate themselves with marijuana? Why, they are just misled by the queen hippie of California herself, Nancy Pelosi (I told you everything was her fault.)

Hearing all this from my dad makes me wonder: if marijuana is so bad for people with depression, then why do so many states allow it for medical use for a similar disorder?

The Reality of Things

This time I began my Google search (reliable I know) looking up what each state lists as medical conditions that can be treated by marijuana.

Although depression didn’t specifically pop up, a condition that I’ve experienced did. This condition is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This disorder is mental/emotional stress as a result of injury or severe psychological shock. People experiencing PTSD can suffer from flashbacks, anxiety, and depression.

So how does marijuana help people with PTSD, and can the same effects be applied to depression? As of now, MAPS (Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies) is working on a study, despite previous government roadblocks, on the effects of THC on those who suffer from PTSD.

One thing that MAPS found is that those who suffer from PTSD have lower levels of anandamide, an endogenous cannabinoid compound. By consuming THC, these levels can be raised.

When it comes to depression, although it is a different condition from PTSD, it affects the same area of the brain. This endocannabinoid system can be treated faster with cannabis.

Now, it’s important to remember that everyone’s chemistry is different, so different treatments are (and aren’t) as effective. Personally, I’m going to stick with my meds. They’ve improved my life immensely, and I’m not about to change that. Will I partake in some canna-business once and awhile? Yes, and I’m not going to worry about it effecting my condition.

The reality of things is, I will keep up with being a mostly-responsible twenty-something who suffers from normal twenty something problems. You know – crippling student loan debt, finding where all the gay girls are hidden, the fact that our coral reefs are dying at an exponential rate, and that there is a large population of my peers who want to do nothing about it all.

At the end of the day, I’m still going to go to my parents’ house and bitch about these issues. My dad is going to respond with a series of “dadternative facts,” and I’m going to storm out in frustration. But, I’m still going to keep coming back. After all, I’m glad he is there for me to talk to.