Dear Dabby

Dabigail Van Buren is an advice columnist here to guide you through your predicaments, cannabis or otherwise.

Dear Dabby,
My boyfriend smokes weed all the time and I don’t smoke. He says he’s medicating, but I swear he just wants to get high. I love him but I feel like he never gets anything done. When I leave for work, he’s smoking and when I get home from work, he hasn’t moved. He goes days without doing dishes, even though he spends most of his time at home. How do I get him to chill out on the smoking and start helping out more?
-Bummed on Boyfriend

Bummed on Boyfriend,
You could try writing a list of things that you would like him to do while you’re at work, some people need prompts! If he can’t handle the list, you should definitely tell him that you think his smoking is getting in the way of his productivity.

It’s a tough call because weed might not be your boyfriend’s problem. He might just be lazy. If you aren’t okay with someone being a couch potato and never cleaning up, you probably shouldn’t live with them. It’s difficult to tell someone that their weed smoking is a problem because for many of us it’s just what we enjoy to do. It can be hard to get someone to change their lifestyle habit, but if he wants to make your relationship work, he will do something to change!

Dear Dabby,
I’ve been trying to clean up my act, so I quit drinking and everything else. I even quit smoking cigarettes. I’ve been saying I’m sober. Before I stopped drinking, I wasn’t much of a smoker. I went through some phases of smoking pot in high school and college, but it hasn’t been consistent. I want to start smoking, especially since I learned that weed can reduce anxiety. Cannabis is a plant, and I know I can’t overdose from it but if I start smoking weed, will that mean I’m not sober? What do I tell people? Is it a drug? Do I need to tell anyone?
-Sober Sally

Sober Sally,
I guess in this day and age, it’s not uncommon to feel like everything we do needs to be publicized, but it doesn’t. You don’t need to tell anyone if you don’t want to. You can say you’re “clean”, as opposed to sober. So, is cannabis a drug? It depends how you use it. If you’re medicating, no, it’s not a drug. If you’re using it to get high, then yes, it’s a drug, but there’s nothing wrong with getting high. Now, whether you are medicating or getting high, marijuana can definitely reduce stress. I suggest smoking an indica to relax your mind.

Dear Dabby,
My mom has never been cool with me smoking. In fact, she’s been strictly un-cool about cannabis for as long as I can remember. She recently got surgery on her knee and is in constant pain. I’m concerned about her using prescription pain meds. I wish she were down for medical marijuana, but I can’t imagine her getting over the stigma of it. How can I get her to understand that CBD is way better for her than prescription meds?
-Help Me Convince Her

Help Me Convince Her,
It’s probably a long shot to get your mom to take a rip from a bong. Instead, start by bringing her attention to marijuana topicals. Marijuana topicals, such as salves, oils, and creams relieve pain and don’t have psychoactive effects. In other words, her pain will go away, she won’t get high, and she won’t become addicted to any harmful substances! Don’t underestimate the power of persuasion.